Loving Me 4 Me... (A 'Stripped' remembrance)

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It is almost incredible that, after almost 14 years, "Stripped" still gives me goosebumps.

And it's not rare feat. After all, this is the follow-up of that self titled album that sold more than 7 million copies only in the US. Expectations were high for this one.

We can say this was the "coming of age" album from her. Tired of her conscious and careful image of her first album, Christina decided to give an 180 degrees change, and boy, for many it was too much.

"Dirrty", the first single, was met with derision and disapproval for the people who thought this was extreme for a former Disney girl (this was pre-Miley and everything, but is a recurring theme in pop music). And the video offended many sensibilities, accustomed to watch little Christina being flirty in an innocent kind of way, not in a straight-forward, come-on imagery, and very sexualized.





In an attempt to demonstrate she still had that thing that make her famous in the first place (her tremendous and skillful voice), she released her behemoth ballad, "Beautiful", and a classic was born. Sung until the end of times in every karaoke competition and "The Voice" blind auditions held, she had the opportunity to recover from the 'failure' of her first single, and made herself immortal with this, well, beautiful ballad about love and acceptance.




One of the recurrent themes from "Stripped" was a desire to be loved for who you are, and self-acceptance. She made raw confessions about family abuse in themes like "I'm OK", the problems she had with her father and how she overcame them in "Fighter", and made self-esteem anthems with "The Voice Within", "Soar" and "Keep On Singin' My Song". Very personal themes, that made us discover a very fragile and vulnerable Christina, that fought all of her youth life to find a voice and found an escape in music, which ultimately saved her and made her the person she was at that moment.



Of course, this album was full of bangers, too. Songs as the rhythmic female-anthem "Can't Hold Us Down" featuring former "Marmalade" collaborator Lil' Kim; "Infatuation" with its latin-infused beat; the pen-assisted Alicia Keys semi-duet "Impossible"; sultry come-on "Get Mine, Get Yours"; or the Sugababes rip-off "Make Over", this album had a little of everything for everyone.



But definitely what made Christina a Legend was definitely THE BALLADS. The aforementioned "Beautiful", "Cruz", my all-time favorite "Loving Me 4 Me" (channeling the Mariah-whistle register, sounds crazy and beautiful), and of course "The Voice Within". She definitely had this thing going on, where she can bare her soul in one note, and she was amazing for that.

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Ultimately, this album was all about empowerment, confidence, feminism, being able to stand up for yourself, and love all around. "Dirrty" may have been a misleading single because it was all about sexiness, dirtiness, and little to no clothes, but perhaps she found suitable to shock the world to be heard, and boy she succeeded at that.

That is why, 14 years later, this is one of my favorite albums of all time. Listening to it today, many memories came to mind, and I appreciate the effort Christina put in this material, working with many great producers and making an album very long (almost 74 minutes), but very rewarding in the end.

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What do you think about this album? Do you feel it is a classic, or way overrated? Sound off on the comments, I'd love to hear from you!

Come Back To Me.. (Janet Is Back!)

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Today I want to celebrate the news that Janet is releasing an album this fall by doing it in the only way I can for news like this one: listening new Janet's "No Sleeep" until I, well, fall sleep. (BTW, it's not a typo, the three "e" are intentional).



I mean, it's friggin' Janet Jackson, FFS!! I'm in heaven right now.

She's also doing a world tour, so definitely she's ready for her comeback. And she deserves it.

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"No Sleep" is a return to form to the old Janet: the sultry, passionate, temptress and seductive Janet that we all love and admire. And she's back with the team that started it all: Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis are the producers of this blast, and let me tell you, they did a marvelous job, combining their hypnotizing beats with Janet's incomparable voice, and the result is magical.

So welcome back, Janet! We were expecting for you, but you made sure to give us plenty for your comeback!

Did you like the song, or you think she should have released something more like "All For You 2.0"? Sound off in the comments!

Artist of the week: Keyshia Cole

First of all... I want to apologize for the lack of updates since September. Right now I am studying a  new career online, and that is exciting. But I promise I will try to update as often as I can, because this is an important part of my life.

And now, back to business. This week has been dedicated to one of the most underrated people on R&B, and I think that's a shame, because she is excellent and very talented: Miss Keyshia Cole.

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Keyshia has been around since 2004, but she had a prior career being mentored by none other than Tupac Shakur. Big stuff. Her first record, a song for the soundtrack of the movie "Barbershop 2: Back in Business", entitled "Never", was a first attempt to get into the spotlight, and although it didn't have a proper success, it was clear that she was destined to bigger things.

Then, magic happens. Her first album, "The Way It Is", appeared, and oh boy, what a treat. I will always say without a doubt that this is one of the best first albums of an artist ever, because it is simply great. She delivered big notes, passion and talent in every song. There are no fillers in this great work: every song has a purpose and it's in the tone of the album. It is really great.





After this album, things seemed to get better for her. She released a second album, "Just Like You", which was also a success, and then featured on some collaborations with artists like P.Diddy and Sean Paul that further helped to get her international recognition.







After that, there were more albums that failed to replicate the success of her first two albums, but that doesn't mean they are bad. Contrary to that, they are excellent, and they are proof that how talented and serious she is in her work, and a truly testament on how underrated is her music.

So saying that, these are my favorite tunes from her, and if you don't know her music, these gems are a very good start:

1. "(I Just Want It) To Be Over": How can you beat  a song title like that? (Obviously, I love parentheses). And boy, this track produced by the same team that produced Alicia Keys, this is definitely one of the best tracks of her debut album. Fortunately, it was a single, and although the video is nothing close to the greatness of the song, this is pure quality.



2. "Down and Dirty": Uptempo songs are not Keyshia's best assets, but in this one, she delivers enough swagger and enthusiasm to make a great song. A hidden gem on her first album.



3. "I Ain't Thru (Featuring Nicki Minaj)": Sure, everything that Minaj touches instantly becomes gold, but let's give props to Keyshia, for maintaining her style over the infectious Minaj rap, and deliver excellent performance on this little ditty.



4. "I Changed My Mind": This Kanye West assisted track was her proper first single, and of course, given the fact that was produced by West and it was her grandeur entrance to the music world and the charts, this is definitely a solid track. And the chorus is really dope, if you ask me.



5. "Let It Go (Featuring Missy Elliott and Lil Kim)": At the pinnacle of her fame, she delivered this track with the assistance of two of the most respected female rappers in the world. Also, it helps that infectious "Juicy Fruit" sample  and simple but effective lyrics. A hit all around.




6. "Please Don't Stop": Although her "A Different Me" album was not the hit it deserved to be, there were plenty of songs that made that album one of her best. Among them, this song that is very uptempo and very fun to sing along. She really let her go in this one, figuratively.




7. "Was It Worth It": Her mid tempos are her best forté, which is demonstrated in this song, that yearns desperation and disappointment all at once. Her phrasing, her voice timber, and her delivery are really magnificent, and I'm not being hyperbolic. A shame this was not a single, it would have been great.



All in all, a very complete artist, whose music stands for itself, and although the recognition for her has waned in recent years, she still is as talented as day one. I'm really glad to be a  fan of her work.

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Do you like Keyshia? Which one is your favorite song from her? Sound off in the comments!

What a difference a year can make....

Looking back, this has been a pretty good year in music. But we're still expecting that song that blow us away and make us swoon all over. But in the meantime, let's take a look back at what some of our favorite artists (and some others) were doing on July 2013, and how they are doing today. This should be fun.


ROBIN THICKE

July 2013: He was enjoying the success of "Blurred Lines", of course, song of the summer 2013, and ready to drop his then new album, also titled "Blurred Lines". He was the flavor of the month, with a beautiful wife, and things seemed pretty well for him, after years of struggling making a mark on the world of music. Only good things seemed to come in his way.

July 2014: "Blurred Lines" proved to be a one-trick pony for him, although the album was full of good tunes, but none of them made the same impression on the general public. He twerked along Miley, got accused of misoginy by his lyrics, get separated from his wife, and made an embarrasingly new album ("Paula") as a plea for forgiveness, but really, no "Blurred Lines" here. Not even "Lost Without U". Only sad, pathetic and shameful tunes. Oh, and also, got eviscerated on Twitter, but again, who doesn't?






BEYONCÉ

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July 2013: She was in the middle of a world tour, and giving several teases of new music and a much awaited album, which fans (including me, of course) were waiting impatiently. In the meantime, she was having fun, and maybe (maybe) mocking all of us who were really growing desperate for our dosis of new Bey's music.

July 2014: Of course, it's her year. Dropping a full self-titled new album out of nowhere, with her corresponding music videos, and embarking on a new tour with her husband. Of course, nothing is perfect, and after all the hoopla about her now infamous elevator brawl between her sister, Solange, and her husband, and an implying accusation of cheating towards Jay Z, they have done nothing to harm her image and her reigning on pop. After all, she's Queen B, y'all.

IGGY AZALEA

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July 2013: She was still an unknown commodity on the US, but the UK was well aware of her antics. She was about to embark on an Australian tour (where she is from) as an opening act for Beyoncé, Her still untitled album was supposed to drop at the time, but the label decided to postpone it, much to her disdain. But things were about to get interesting for her, obviously.

July 2014: Well. First off, she managed to tie The Beatles as a new artist having a No. 1 and 2 with her official first single (the omnipresent "Fancy" featuring Charli XCX and Ariana Grande's "Problem" as a featured artist) on Billboard Charts. And then, being the first female rapper (yes, she IS a rapper, an australian white one) to be at the top of Billboard for 6 weeks in a row. And, obviously, being dissed by Nicki Minaj, but again, who doesn't? 

MARIAH CAREY

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July 2013: Mariah was on the verge of having her second big comeback, via releasing her expected album which she entitled "The Art of Letting Go", but she postponed it for some reason. The album was already well awaited after "#Beautiful", that song with Miguel which was just great. And after a much publicised gig on American Idol, along with "Frenemy" Nicki Minaj (both hated it), thing went all sour.

July 2014: Finally, she released her new album, with the astounding name "Me.I Am Mariah: The Elusive Chanteuse" (no kidding here). That title certainly didn't pick the interest of the general public, since it's the first Mariah release to not achieve 100,000 copies at the first week, making it a lowest in her career. The bad thing? The album is really good, much better than 2009's "Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel" (Oh, Mariah, you and your titles). Maybe she should go back to name her albums on a single word. They have been the most succesful.

SAM SMITH

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July 2013: Sam already made a No.1 hit with "La La La", a Naughty Boy track, on the UK, and it was about time to start making music on his own. He was unknown at the time on the US, but it was very clear that great things were ahead of him.

July 2014: And ideed great things came for him. He released his album, "In The Lonely Hour", which went to No. 1 on the UK and No. 2 on the US. He's now friend with Taylor Swift, with granted, made him kind of famous on the US and of course it helped to create a lot of buzz around him. But clearly, this guy is talented, and deserving of the success he is having.

So yes, a year can be a difference between success and failure. And it definitely a lot of things can happen in such a tiny frame of time. So remember: you can still find love, become rich and have a great career in music one year from now. What are you waiting for? Go get it! But remember: hard work is always part of the ecuation. Simple as that. Cheers!

Looking over my shoulder
I was so much younger then
I can't believe what happened
A year ago today

Delta Goodrem, "A Year Ago Today".

Thing that are so alike (to me) until they're not...

Basically this is a lazy post, so forgive me for that. But I have this idea, about things in music that sound basically the same, but they are not related at all. Unless, of course, I'm actually out of my mind and they don't sound the same. But I think I'm right on some of them, so please, let me know what you think in the comments (don't be shy, you can curse me all you want!)

1. The intro of "Let It Go" (the right version, not Demi's)...



... and the intro of "All Of Me" by John Legend.



I know, I know, they are different, and it's only the piano, but sometimes, when I heard the first accords, I was having a hard time telling them apart. So sue me.


2. New PSY featuring Snoop Dogg (!), "Hangover" (especially the chorus)...



...and Lil' Wayne's "A Milli" (which I ADORE).



A no-brainer. The fact that practically Snoops raps the entire song should be an indication of that. An aside: I guess Snoop Lion didn't stick, and now he's doing duets with PSY. Well, it happens.


3. The videos "Ride" and "Born To Die" by Lana del Rey...





...and Taylor Swift "I Know You Were Trouble".



I mean, duh. I guess Taylor thought this was a good idea, but Lana pulled it off effortless, and Taylor looked really out of field. But I like those songs, so I guess it's a win-win for all (not for Lana, though, she were never credited for those gorgeous mini-movies).


4. "Bedtime Story" by Madonna, circa 1995 (Live on the Brits!)...



... and Lady Gaga's "ARTPOP" (Live on The Tonight Show) circa 2014.



Yeah, I'm putting this out there to see what kind of reaction it gets. Seriously, the first time I watched Gaga's performance I reminisced of that unique performance by Madonna (unique in the sense that Madonna didn't proper toured or promoted "Bedtime Stories" on other venues). And I like both songs. And they looked so similar. For me, anyway.


5. The "Heart Attack" epidemy on pop... not literally, thank God.











What's so romantic about a heart attack? No, just no. Heartache will be fine, but a heart attack sound more like going on a rush to ER than anything else. Funny thing: these are all from the last two years, so I think they're out of ideas here.

And so am I. Until next post, where I can really talk about important stuff, I guess. Or at least more exciting, I promise.

Gaga, Kelly and Richardson: too sexual? Get out of here!

This week, footage of the not-released video of "Do What U Want" song by Lady Gaga was leaked...

Basically, a sexy medical appointment (!) with R. Kelly, a supposed gynechologist (!) and scenes from her seminaked, dancing around some tabloids and covered only with newspapers. Nothing particularly shocking, by Gaga standards.


But then, the Internet exploded, accusing Gaga of promoting rape. New York Post commented: "Gaga had a video by an alleged sexual predator, starring another sexual predator. With the theme 'I'm going to do whatever I want with your body'? It was literally an ad for rape."


And you know what? I wholeheartedly agree with that.


Let's look at the facts, shall we?


1. "Do What U Want" was one of the few songs from "Artpop" album that gained notoriety despite the risquee lyrics. The phrase "Do what you want with my body" is not exactly a subtle invitation. but Gaga was very clear that this was intended for all the "haters" that made comments about her body.


2. Then, in an act of revenge (?), she decided to make this cover for the single:

as a big "Fuck You" to all her detractors. Coincidentally, this photo was taken by Terry Richardson, the director of "Do What U Want" no-video (more on him later).


3. The song is a mixture of synth pop and R&B, with a ver 80's vibe. So accordingly, she decided to recruit R. Kelly, who has made that particular sound a trademark of his own. Many outlets were not happy with the duet partner, given the background of Kelly, which includes 'allegedly' having sex with underage girls and peeing on women, not mentioning the fact that he was accused of marrying Aaliyah (RIP) when she was 15. The nerve.


4. The song was not meant to be released, although being a fan-favorite, and with the cold reception towards the already-announced second single, "Venus", Gaga and her team decided to give it a shot. By this time, "Artpop" had failed to reach the heights of their predecessor album, "Born This Way", so a plan to save the album through this song was put on motion.


5. Gaga heavily promoted DWUW through all over the media. Here, the two most controversial presentations, both with R. Kelly. To me, these two are, at best, overrated, since Gaga has been doing real performances with all so much gimmick and better results.







6. Gaga recruited famed Richardson to shoot the video for DWUW. Richardson had recently made his way through the video media with positive outcome. Among others, he directed Miley Cyrus' "Wrecking Ball" (no strange to controversy itself) and Beyoncé's "XO" (which seems odd since 'Yonce is very much aware who she associates with). Richardson had a very high profile in Hollywood, with his risquee and at times rauchy portfolio, which for me is also way overrated.

...again, no subtlety here (can you start to see the pattern?) Besides, Richardson has been deemed a "creepy guy" and recently some models alleged that he has conducted inappropiate sexual behavior towards them. He maintains his innocence, because you see, he only photographs sexual imagery, he doesn't perform it. Alrighty, then.


7. So, after all this, Gaga deemed appropiate to shoot a video featuring R. Kelly and directed by Richardson, because why not? The joke tells itself. But then, on an unexpected move, she decided to drop completely the project, at that time blaming "others" that wanted to damage her integrity and artistry and so on. Gaga, queen of controversy, decided to pull off something that reads "controversial" since this inception.


But now, it seems very clear that even for Gaga this was more than what she bargain form, and we can't blame her. According to the images, Gaga is somewhat sedated and then they decided to have a party with her while unconscious. R. Kelly as a bad doctor is somewhat discomforting, and we cannot really fathom what was Gaga thinking at the time she made this video.


Then again, we will wait impatiently for it to come out, so we can judge accordingly.

In the end, DWUW is really a great song, and thus I decided to stick (pardon the expression) with the Gaga/Christina version, another controversial decision, more on the line of  "I never in life thought these two would sing together, I thought they hate each other" category than in the "OMG! This is so raunchy even for my standards" category. And for me, this works better. Cannot embed the video, so please follow the link if you haven't been blessed by that performance. Heaven, indeed.


So sound off: is it truly "shocking" this no-video for Gaga? Have you seen it coming? (Again, sorry for the pun).

Album Review: Katy Perry, "PRISM"

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One of the most anticipated albums of this fall must have been this one. Katy Perry has been omnipresent on pop since "One of The Boys", circa 2007, and we have never looked back. This is the case of the church-girl-going-to-superstar we have witnessed several times (Whitney, Beyoncé, et al), but in this case, she decided to strip away of that persona (sometimes, on a literal way), and embrace her pop roots and become the brand that we all now love.

And then, "Teenage Dream" came, and boy we never saw that one coming. Five number one songs, more than 5 million copies sold worldwide, and a great great world tour (which I've attended, luckily), the stakes were so high that she needed to deliver. Did she do it?

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Well, first off: this is no "Teenage Dream" 2.0. While that album was goofy, unpretentious and straight-to-the-head pop, this album actually conveys a lot of styles and genres, all well crafted and bottled into tiny pieces, especially designed to stuck in the mind of the listeners and oblige them to stuck on repeat, until the lyrics acquire some meaning and you're able to sing along on your house, your car or whatever place you are listening to them.

But then, was that Katy's intention? She said about this album that she wanted to go to a "darker place", definitely inspired by the failed marriage she had with Rusell Brand. But then, love struck again in the form of Mr. John Mayer, and clearly influence part of this record.

Songs like "Legendary Lovers", with its bhangra style, or "Double Rainbow", a Sia-assisted collaboration, approaches the subject of her new found happiness, while adding some elements of new age and introspection into its lyrics. Meanwhile, "Ghost" recalls the infamous breakup with Rusell, turning this song into some cathartic experience for her, in a mid-tempo ballad that sounds both haunting and reassuring.

I have to say, "Roar" as a first single, as much derided that has been because the similarity with Sara Bareilles' "Brave", and its really, really goofy video, disappointed me at first. But then, as formulaic as it seems, it grown on me until it became my personal anthem for empowerment and self-assurance. Which I believe it was the smartest plan, because Katy seems to be aware, more than anyone, what kind of artist she is and her limitations, but most of all, her strenghts.



This album could be viewed as a double feature: for the first part, a string of sure-to-be hits, including two promotional singles that have my heart (and my replay button) stuck on repeat: the 90's Ce-Ce Peniston-like throwback "Walking on Air" (please, view the iTunes Festival presentation for maximum effect) and the trappy, strip-club-ready "Dark Horse" that is indeed the dark horse of the album, and I think it would be a potential hit, a-la "E.T." of "Teenage...", despite the atrocious rap of Juicy J. Minus that, this song is  a pop tiny masterpiece.

The second part is more ballad-oriented, with the themes of breaking up and empowerment hinted in the first part, going full in this second one. Katy is not very proficient delivering heartfelt ballads, but "Love Me" and "This Moment" feel more on her wheel, and definitely made a case for her, being this stablishing her as a more mature artist.

There are hints of the bubbly persona of "Teenage..." era, like "Birthday" with its anthemic vibe, and "International Smile", which it could very well have fit into "Teenage..." tracklist. And then, you got "This is How We Do", another 90's revival that flirts with lite hip-hop and have the goofiest and most certainly truest line of all: "Mariah Karaoke-y". Because, you know, Mariah and karaoke are certainly a match made in heaven. And props to "International Smile", an ode to all traveling people and the one that mentions Mexico, of all places. (Thanks for that, Katy). And of course, the Daft-Punk-y bridge that it certainly made me smile.

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While "PRISM" IS a great pop album, it certainly falls short to live up to Katy standards. Now she is a pop tour-de-forcé, and we certainly expected more from her. But then again, she has always been very humble and clear of what to expect of her. She is very aware of her pop persona, and she has never intended to find the Holy Grail of pop, whatever that is. And we appreciate that: that despite all of her flaws and misconceptions, Katy is very down to earth and relatable. And that's why we are very happy for her success.

My rate: 8 out of 10. What's yours?

Is Britney still relevant...?

Judging from the success of her new song, I should dare to say: YES.

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There was a time in history that Brit Brit was undoubtedly a tour-de force in pop music, when it first came out with "...Baby, One More Time". She established as a pop star that gradually and eventually took over the world, without seemingly too much effort.

 

And then it came all of her struggles, because that's what happens with every other Disney princesses every now and then. But she, like a phoenix, returned to her former glory and eventually gained back her throne, which has been disputed for several times and apparently no one can take it from her.

 

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Which brings us to the subject on hand. After 15 years of more hits tan misses, do we still care about what Britney does in life? After she has been accused several times of lip-synching, not dancing as well as before, and basically being a shadow of the great Britney she once was?

 

Let's do the music do the talking this time, please:

So fine, "Work Bitch" is not even remotely the best song from Britney. In fact, it is quite underwhelming, compared to other first-singles from previous albums ("Oops"? "Womanizer"?). But it quite enjoyable and in tune with what is "cool" and "fashionable" in this day and age.

Which frankly, is one of her best assets. Being one tiny step forward of all her peers, always offering something that feels new and fresh, amid all the disposable music that plagues the airwaves (or bandwidth, to be more precisely).

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For the first time in years, Britney looks alive and more like a human being, instead of that robotic image she has been sporting lately. And even we all know she can't dance as well as she used to do it circa 2001, at least she is doing her own moves, which mostly consists in jazz hands and being standing still or laying on the floor.

 

But we cannot deny that Britney has something appealing on her. And we enjoyed every little thing she does. That's why, after all these years, we are still attracted to her allure, despite her many, many flaws, and I think that in itself is quite an achievement.

 

 

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So, for me, it is a yes. A definite yes. It's up to her to improve her legacy, now with the residency she's about to head up on Vegas. And a new album on December. So yes, we still have Briney for a  while, bitch.



10 years of being "Crazy In Love" with THAT song!

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I'm thinking every pop connoisseur like myself remember exactly where we were when we first heard this GLORIOUS song. Me, I was at an Internet café, which were very popular at that time (10 years from now! I'm getting so old). Looking up on the web, I encountered the announcement that Beyoncé song was available for download, so I proceeded to did the obvious, and oh, boy, I've never looked back since.

 

 

 

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I have to be honest: I didn't immediately dig it. A song so atypical of that time, with horns, trumpets, and the like, and a very 70's vibe so unlikely for that era. I mean, not the current sound on the charts (mostly filled with hip hop collaborations and R&B contemporary sounds). But then, this song and the magnetic sample courtesy of the Chi-Lites changed the face of the pop, R&B and hip hop music, for sure.

 

 

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The song gradually grown on me and everyone else, and it was a matter of time for it to reach number 1 on the Billboard charts for eight straight weeks. That's an accomplishment itself, but being the first single as a soloist, Beyoncé really knew how to made an impact on the public. Of course, Jay Z's rap was also responsible for its success (I'm very proud of the fact that, still to this day, I'm able to sing the Jay Z's part in its entirety).

 

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Rich Harrison was the producer of this gem, and of course his popularity went through the roof with this one. Many artists worked with him, and he produced several hits trying to revive the success of this sound, but none of them took him to the levels that this song reached. And that's fine, so many great songs and artists came out of this effort. Just to name a few:

 

 ...and so many others.

 

The legacy of this song, besides the fact that established Beyoncé as a global superstar, is that brought a breath of fresh air to the sound of the 2000's, so plagued with disposable rappers, hip hop collaborations and a declining on pop music. So basically, this song, using a sample of a 70's song, established a model to be followed by many artists and a sound so fierce, as her moniker Sasha Fierce would tell us years later.

 

Of course, this song has been covered many times, but my favorite is the current version of Emeli Sande and the Bryan Ferry Orchestra, in a 20's spirit and it showed this song is indeed timeless.

 

Oh, Beyoncé, this song of yours is already unforgettable. Here's to another 10 years of being 'Crazy in Love' about it! 

Fashion disasters at the MET Gala?? And a Kylie and Madonna reunion, why not??

I'm not a fashion expert, but this morning I saw some pictures of the MET Gala 2013, a yearly event that takes place obviously on  The Metropolitan's Museum and gathers the creme of the creme of Hollywood. And of course, this being a fashion event, you would think people would be more aware of what they dress because this is THE event for it. Not even The Oscars had this exposure regarding fashion, but judging from the pics I've seen, so many people definitely missed the mark, dropped the ball or didn't read the memo, whatever analogy works best for you.

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Apparently, that grim face was part of the Kristin Stewart attire.

The theme of the night was Punk: Chaos to Couture, because there has to be a theme in these things. And obviously, punk was the attitude all the attendants needed to demonstrate through their clothes and all. Some of them got the look right, and definitely showed the fashionista that lies within them.

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Emma Watson and Miranda Kerr, being cute and fierce.

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Rooney Mara

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Jennifer Lawrence, Emma Watson, Anne Hathaway & Taylor Swift

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Kylie Minogue, being Kylie Minogue. That is, regal.

What these artists show was a very good sense of simplicity, a thing not too many of the Hollywood stars are known for. And obviously, it worked. Those gals looked amazing and although some of them (like Jennifer Lawrence) were not as punk as they should, they definitely hit the mark and passed the fashion test.

Others? Not so much.

Kim Kardashian:

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Seriously, this woman knows no limits. Whoever that said pregnant woman can't be fashionistas, obviously got inspired by this woman. I mean, not nitpicking her weight (it is obvious that a pregnant woman can be that big), but using a dress that accentuates you weight is just plain wrong. It looked like a table cloth, and a cheap one.

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...or a sofa. With an integrated cushion

She knows that there's a thousand ways a pregnant woman can deliver on the red carpet, but she seems to think nobody will notice this mess of a dress. Or maybe she knows and she's teasing us. Either way, this is not the look of an entepreneur and a 'celebrity' (not sure how to call her), so this will go into history as an utterly failure. Again, it's not her body weight, it's the way she didn't accept it as an aside from being pregnant.

Nicki Minaj

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Obviously, Ms. Minaj is particularly known for her fashion style, bordering into the ridiculousness. So a MET Gala inspired in punk could seem like a perfect setting for a bold statement on her part. Instead, she definitely missed the mark by being way too tame by her own standards, let alone the punk standards. Afro looked way out of tune, and definitely this attire didn't look well on her. Maybe it's the waistline. She looked so out of place. And I hope one day women understand that those tatoos don't look so well on dresses (looking at you, Rihanna).

Beyoncé

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Beyoncé is Beyoncé, a force of nature to be reckoned with. And yet, this is so dissapointing. Aside from the fact that this is not punk at all (being punk an attitude more than a dress), it seemed a little bit excessive from her. And God, I'm not sure if those dark hair roots are on trend now, but they look so awful. She can do better than this.

Madonna

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I really, really love Madonna. Why wouldn't I? But this? Let's face it: she is no longer a thirty something to rock these outfits, and although she looks fit and glam, this is way too much for her to handle nowadays. For a woman with a punk and fuck you attitude, this comes cheap and underwhelming. And the bob, so much Edna Mode resembling, was also something so wacky. But then, who can assure this is what Madge intended for it to be? If that's what she was all about, well, mission accomplished.

Ashley Olsen

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Now, entering the realms of the ludicrous. Like a moth to a flame.... This has written 'absurd' all over the place. This posture tries to make sense for this dress, but God it's awful. I know she's rich and all, and this is vintage and all, but seriosly, can someone advice these young starlets regarding haute couture, please? Won't somebody think of the children??

Of course there were plenty of dreadful dresses, but these are the ones that really drive me to write on this subject. I'm not usually a savvy fashionista (I don't consider my style fashion as a 'style', per se) but I know what looks good and bad on myself and others.

A corollary for this Gala: if Lena Dunham somehow manages to look better than you, consider it a big fail on your personal style.

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I wonder if she can manage those high heels.

And get this consolation prize: Madonna and Kylie Minogue, together in this gala. Pop royalty on the same roof! Amazing, isn't it? The Queen and The Princess of Pop. Besides the fact that Madonna's boy toy photobombed the pic blocking Kylie, this is pure bliss right here.

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Seriously, whats-his-name. You're blocking a historical moment. Shit head.







Who was the best and the worst dressed for you on this Gala? Sound off in the comments!